DEADEYE: I say - it's a beast of a name, ain't it - Dick Deadeye?
BOATSWAIN: It's not a nice name.
DEADEYE: I'm ugly too, ain't I?
BOATSWAIN: You are certainly plain.
DEADEYE: And I'm three-cornered too, ain't I?
BOATSWAIN: You are rather triangular.
DEADEYE: Ha! Ha! That's it. I'm ugly, and they hate me for it. For you all hate me, don't you?
BOATSWAIN: Well, Dick, we wouldn't go for to hurt any fellow creature's feelings, but you can't expect a chap with such a name as Dick Deadeye to be a popular character - now can you?
DEADEYE: No.
BOATSWAIN: It's asking too much, ain't it?
DEADEYE: It is. From such a face and form as mine the noblest sentiments sound like the black utterances of a depraved imagination. It is human nature. I am resigned.
Richard lost his right eye in a bizarre gardening accident and replaced it with a cheap prosthetic sold to him by a native trader. He could have gone the traditional pirate route and worn an eyepatch, but Dick thinks it looks great and nobody can tell it's fake. Mock his weird eye at your peril. He might kill you just for mentioning it. And don't stare. That's just plain rude. Even dirty pirates have feelings. And pirates are known to carry grudges for years, even decades. They never forget. Or forgive. And they will track you to the ends of the world if needs be. Remember that before you attack one. Know what you're getting yourself into. The cycle of violence, once set in motion, is difficult to break. And those bad men from the wooden ships are the worst of the lot. A word to the wise.
Not to be confused with that other fellow named
Deadeye. Not the same person. He's the one with the impressive moustache and the tan. I'm the pale pirate with the bad attitude. This island is big enough for two of us, I suppose. Not saying I won't run him through with a rusty cutlass next time we meet. Not saying I will. We'll just see.
Elected Mayor of Durham in 2024. Amazing considering he's a murderous pirate and is hardly ever there. But if they wish to pay him to do a job poorly Deadeye will gladly accept the gold. The odds of finding him in his office there are about as good as finding the conch or encountering a sasquatch in the Wiksik Spirit Hut. Could happen. But most unlikely.