Barber Surgeon O'Neil

I hate York. Too much damn foot traffic.

Since your last move:
Hurricane Irene says �I was farming that elephant. Attacking and healing it. Then you went and killed it. Nice one Tibbalt.” (2024-01-14 23:53)
Tibbalt says “Sorry Irene, I didn’t know.” (2024-01-15 06:18)
Tibbalt says “There. Now you can put up an elephant hunting sign.” (2024-01-15 06:19)
Shroombaker says “Ahoy!” (2024-01-17 13:46)
Horrabin The Clown ducks the door lintel and stiltwalks in to look for entertainment. (2024-01-17 17:23)
Horrabin The Clown says “What's this? A manly man's establishment?” (2024-01-17 17:25)
Horrabin The Clown says “I'd avail myself of the services here but my hair is only touched by the finest of red dyes.” (2024-01-17 17:25)
Horrabin The Clown leers. (2024-01-17 17:25)
Horrabin The Clown throws a patch of hair to the barber. (2024-01-17 17:26)
Horrabin The Clown says “That's a cannibal scalp, VeganCannibal by name. He may need your services.” (2024-01-17 17:26)
Horrabin The Clown says “HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH!” (2024-01-17 17:27)
Horrabin The Clown ransacks the supply crates. (2024-01-17 17:27)
Horrabin The Clown says “Bugger! Never any good drugs.” (2024-01-17 17:27)
Helena Handbasket says “A clown! Do you make balloon animals?” (2024-01-18 00:15)
Horrabin The Clown grins. (2024-01-18 01:17)
Horrabin The Clown says “I do. From special baloons.” (2024-01-18 01:18)
Horrabin The Clown rummages in his pack and takes out what looks like a long, pink sausage skin. (2024-01-18 12:43)
Horrabin The Clown blows air into the balloon and begins twisting and tying knots. He pauses to grin. (2024-01-18 12:44)
Horrabin The Clown says “I got this from a cannibal called Wendy. Did you now that there are thirty feet of balloon materials inside a cannibal?” (2024-01-18 12:45)
Horrabin The Clown finishes twisting and presents the lady with a fairly impressionist coiled snake with a little balloon man in its mouth. (2024-01-18 12:47)
Horrabin The Clown says “TADAH! A giant python, just like the one hanging around Wiksik.” (2024-01-18 12:48)
Horrabin The Clown takes out a futuristic looking metal tube contraption. He winks, "A keepsake from a Dalek." (2024-01-18 12:48)
Horrabin The Clown pushes native herbs into the end of the tube the lights a splint and sets the herbs to burning. He inhales mightily. (2024-01-18 12:49)
Horrabin The Clown blows a cloud of fragrant smoke then puffs into the smoke. A shape forms, a three-masted ship sailing on the ocean. (2024-01-18 12:51)
Horrabin The Clown takes another long toke and blows short puffs of smoke. Tentacles wrap around the smoke ship and crush it until it sinks beneath the smoke waves. (2024-01-18 12:52)
Horrabin The Clown says “The Ghost Ship! Sunk by the mighty Kraken and now haunting the shores of Shartak. Have you seen it and its cursed crew? Beware their wrath.” (2024-01-18 12:53)
Horrabin The Clown coughs furiously, hacking up a loogie that he spits out the open window. (2024-01-18 12:54)
Horrabin The Clown says “Remember kids - don't do drugs - leave that to the professional.” (2024-01-18 12:54)
Horrabin The Clown sways alarmingly atop his stilts. He takes a quick, tottering bow and then holds out a hat ready to receive coins. (2024-01-18 12:55)
Shroombaker says “There's a line for haircuts? What is this... Supercuts?” (2024-01-18 14:24)
An 800 Pound Gorilla kills Horrabin The Clown with a heavy sword. (2024-01-18 23:57)
An 800 Pound Gorilla carves pieces off the body of Horrabin The Clown and begins eating! (2024-01-18 23:57)
An 800 Pound Gorilla carves pieces off the body of Horrabin The Clown and begins eating! (2024-01-18 23:57)
An 800 Pound Gorilla carves pieces off the body of Horrabin The Clown and begins eating! (2024-01-18 23:57)
An 800 Pound Gorilla collects the head of Horrabin The Clown. (2024-01-18 23:58)
Helena Handbasket says “BAK MOGKAM! BAK MOGKAM!!!” with a slight accent. (2024-01-19 00:24)
An 800 Pound Gorilla grins and farts forcefully before exiting the hut. The stench lingers long after the ape has gone. (2024-01-19 00:26)

Since your last move:
The Mad Dwarf gives you 1 gold coin. (2023-09-15 06:26)
The Mad Dwarf says “I see you were careful with the beard... hehe” (2023-09-15 06:27)
The Mad Dwarf says “Be well.. ” (2023-09-15 06:29)

Be well too dwarf! I have a coupon for fiddy percent off your next visit.

You've really got something Cletus. That something is cellulite.

Real mature Graagh. I don't like you anymore.

Ryan O'Neil

How about letting one of your cousins join the clan?

You see Barber Surgeon O'Neil. A distant cousin to the O'Neil Clan. Barber Surgeon O'Neil sees you need a blood-letting and your mutton-chops trimmed.



In England barbers and surgeons originally had separate guilds, but these were merged by Henry VIII in 1540 as the United Barber-Surgeons Company. The most prominent of these men was almost certainly the Irishman Barber Surgeon O'Neil. Lost on an ocean voyage, a statue was erected to him in his home-town of Glasgow. And he was much mourned by his wife, 17 kids, his valet, his mistress, a girlfriend, and his cat named sparky.